Britney Spears Bikini Pictures Still Confuse

Britney Spears spent time with her kids on a boat in Sydney Harbour over the weekend, and you know what that means: Reluctantly posted Britney Spears bikini pictures. Though, I've got to say, in those pictures where she leaning over, and you can't see her face. Yeah, maybe.

Britney Spears is Hot? No F'ing Way!

I refuse to believe that these are actually pictures of Britney Spears, because if it was her, that would mean Britney Spears is hot, and that goes against every law of the known Universe. No, this is either special effects, Photoshop, a spell cast by the most powerful warlock, or just some strange dream, but there is no way that Britney Spears is actually hot. We should sue Candies for false advertising.

Britney Spears Bikini Pictures Standout From Her Recent Work

Let us resign ourselves to the fact that we will never see the pre-crazy, pre-IHOP Big Bacon Scramble Britney Spears ever again. What Britney once was, a top tenner, that's gone. However, in the context of baggy shorts and ill fitting tops going for Vente Mocha Grande Britney, these Britney Spears bikini pictures actually mark something of a comeback for the former top-sexy pop star. Granted, she's still dating her agent, which, you know, is like open-mouth kissing your red-headed cousin, but despite the obvious junk in the trunk, yep, I'd turn my head on the beach to see the yellow-bikini clad Britney pass by. That's a something. Enjoy.

Britney Spears Nipples Poke Into Her Boyfriends Affairs

Don't you hate it when your girlfriend's nipples show up announced at your office to check out what's going on? Britney Spears nipples poked around her boyfriend's place of work yesterday, stretching the limits of decent girlfriend behavior as much as they stretched the material of her tank top. According to rumors, Britney Spears nipples swell up when there's danger afoot, and perhaps she felt her current beau was going extracurricular with one of the many ambitious young hotties at his agency, either that or an earthquake was imminent, because her teats where on full alert as she cruised the hallways of William Morris yelling, 'Jason, Jason baby, mama's got milk!' Enjoy.